In-perfectionist
Dear Beloved,
Welcome back! I know that I’ve disappeared for a while, but I am so glad to be back. I’m loaded with lessons and stories to share about God’s amazing grace and mercy.
For starters, if there is one thing that life has taught me this past year, it's that the words plans and control remain absolutely weightless in the grand scheme of things. They are a total sham unless they directly follow the words "God".
"It's a part of God's plan."
"I have no reason to fear, God is in control.”
“Many are the plans of a man’s heart, But it is the Lords, Purpose that prevails.”
I will be the first to admit that this is one of my biggest struggles. I have nothing against plans. I make plans with friends and plan out my day all the time. What I fail to realize is that God will have the final say. See, I'll have a set vision and plan in my head and once they fail, my disappointment is very… visible.
However, while this is still something I struggle with, it is also something that God is actively breaking down.
For example, every year all of the seniors at my school go to Grad Bash. The tales we've heard have been nothing but legendary. This was the field trip that would make the last 4 years of pain, tears, and restless nights worth it. Not to mention, due to COVID-19, my graduating class was the first class to encounter a Grad Bash in 3 years. (That's right… all the tales of legendary fun and memories, were 3 years old and most definitely embellished because of my own wishes.)
Regardless, I had it all planned out. I would group hop. Hit all the areas, taste all the food, ride all the rides, with my different friend groups. Now I find it ironic that my whole plan was based on the idea of not having a plan and “going with the flow”.
Allow me to introduce you to Gaby!
Gaby is one of my lifelong friends! Her plan was very similar to mine. But God had his way and neither of our checklists were completed. Not only did it rain, but we spent almost all of our time with one group, in one area. When we finally branched off we only had about an hour or two left before we had to find our buses, but I honestly think that we had more fun together than we ever would have apart.
No, our plans didn't work out. But the end result was greater than freshman year Alyssa would have ever thought possible. God made a way. I'm sure he laughed at my schedule and said, "Yeah okay that's cute. How about this?"
You may wonder what it was like to let go of a 3-year-old plan and be perfectly fulfilled. Let me just say, it was not easy. It was not a pretty sight. I'm sure if you ask Gaby, she would say I even hit the hysterical laughing phase at one point. But once I took my eyes off of the stress and trying to control the night, I finally saw how perfect it was. {Biblically we can see this in Matthew 14 / Jesus walking on water.}
We collectively need to work on being the best in-perfectionists.
“The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. ”
